It’s very pronto.

We know you can’t wait to slap our stuff on your face, so, here’s what’s what:

Orders placed by 4:00 p.m. EST = Processed in 24 hours
Orders placed after 4:00 p.m. EST = Processed in 48 hours

Do you want Next-Day Air or 2nd-Day Air shipping? Those orders need to be placed by 1:00 p.m. EST to make that kind of magic happen.

How much:
All orders over $50 will ship for free. Otherwise, our flattest of flat rates is a flat $7.99.

Where to:
All 50 states in the U.S.A.*
APO/FPO/DPO (right on)
Canada

Asterisk: Allow for 3 to 5 days in the contiguous United States (those are the ones that are all touching each other) and up to around 8 days for Alaska and Hawaii.

With Who? (or is it Whom?*):
USPS and UPS are the primary go-tos of Crooked Chaps. That said, FedEx could sneak in there sometimes (depending on the need). You know, we might just go rogue in rare instances, and we humbly reserve the freedom to do what’s best if the situation calls for it.

Asterisk: We don’t care about your grammar.

Trackability:
We’re digital mates with Shopify so we can help you, well, shop better. You’ll get a confirmation email with tracking info when you place your order.

Yeah, of course. But please, be cool.

Returns:
All returns need to be made within 30 (three-zero) days of purchase.

The product must be:
A. Unopened
B. Unused

If you’re returning something, here’s how it goes: Get a return authorization number on the emails at customerservice@crookedchaps.com or by phoning [ 800# here ].

Exchanges:
All exchanges need to be made within 30 days of purchase.

The product must be:
A. Unopened
B. Unused

We’re totally down with exchange if there’s shipping damage or we sent the wrong thing. If that happens, you won’t be on the hook for shipping costs. Once we get it back and we check it out, we will credit the charges to you.

No.

Hell no.